Manifest

Hey all.

I, I have not been my best, of late.  I thought it was PMS and my period started this week and there is still this sense of blarness that hangs around me.

Am I living in a bell jar…

Anyhoots, I was going to post the Card of the Day last night when news of Chadwick Boseman’s death and things just took a turn for me.

My dad died in late 2018.  I took 2019 off and made plans for 2020 to be my year.  On January 1st, 2020, I put on my pearls (cuz it’s the ‘20’s now!) and went out for dinner and a movie and that was the last time I went out and had fun!

I’m also dealing with a break-up.  I thought I was doing good with that, but I am not. 

Marvel and the Marvel Cinematic Universe was the love language I shared with my partner.  Hearing about Chadwick Boseman’s death, while I was writing out my feelings, brought a lot of stuff up in me. 

I have written out my ToDoList for the month of September.  I am trying very hard to work my way out of this funk and get to a better place.

I have been looking at this spread in my Tarot Planner (from owlandbonestarot) and getting out my Flower Speak deck out, let’s see what I can manifest.

What do I want to manifest?  I want Dandelion, I want strength.  I want the power to do what I want to do and not just feel like I can’t do anything.

How can I make it happen?  Cosmos, I need to find that out on my own.  Not helpful…

What supports the manifestation process is Violet, Vervain, and Star of Bethlehem. 

Let’s take this one card at a time.

Violet, getting over this break-up will help me find my strength.

Vervain, parts of me are fighting, Morning Glory and Rose, my healing and moving on…

Last is Star of Bethlehem, end of pain.

How will I feel after getting my strength?  I will feel Hawkweed, I will be able to move.

If I can get over this fucking break-up, I will have my power back.  I find it odd that’s what the cards say.  Early in the break-up, I felt this rush of creativity, of doing stuff I wanted to do, for myself, and not for him.

Let me work on myself, and hopefully, I will get my powers back. 

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